To Broil a Horse

This absurdist, cut-up adventure is constructed from remixed and redacted spam emails.

Title and theme went on and on: old Ralph Rinkelmann and his innumerable rubber trees in the center of a basin. And wringing from them the juice of a lemon.

To broil a horse.

It closed around him. Here and there, for five minutes, tender boil’d, thick, with a little milk.

The major general served gratis, paid for the cross.

I held my head as high as I could, and very swiftly reviewed the scene. Just as I placed a blue ribbon around the donkey’s neck, and called out her name, Clara, we were visited by Major Powell. One sorrow comes close upon the heels of another.

Rapture? It is the invention of some madman!

“As ye please, for all of me,” said the doctor, who ignored his classes.

The garrison of Germans was armed, heading definitively for Bloomsbury.


Spam email arranged and massaged by Daniel “Cactus” Hintz, a San Francisco music theorist, media excavator, and post-haiku free-verse argonaut.

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Dan Hintz

Dan Hintz

Dan Hintz is a photographer, noise artist, and radio producer based in Brooklyn. He's perhaps best known for his noise and guitar work in the bands Nuclear Death Wish, Hideous Replica, Leavenworth, Alien Farm, and Hungry Ghost. Hintz also has written several books of poetry and hundreds of micro-stories. His writing has previously appeared in The Fabulist, The Wire, Facet, The Vehicle, Karamu, Option, Raygun, Huh, Bikini, San Francisco Medicine, Bullet Train, Please Shut Up Madame, and Muzzle.

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